How to deal with ocd ruining my life that is ruining my life?

Many options.: There are medications which can help with your symptoms see a pro. There are also behavioral modification techniques which can help you. These can be learned by a therapist. There are therapist who specialize in this kind of thing. There are also local support groups which can be helpful you can google this to find ones near you. There are also books on adult ocd which you can search on amazon.