My husband and i have been married for 1 yr, we have a 4 month old. we fight & hes not the father i thought he would be. do we need counseling?

Need Counseling?: A new marriage and a new baby are a potent combination of stressful issues in any marriage. I am not a psychologist but i would suggest getting help anytime you cannot resolve difference alone. Your marriage and family are precious commodities and worth help from family, friends, minister, or mental health professional. Give each other a break, you may be dealing with stress more than anything.

Not a birthright: Much of parenting is learned - and not necessarily from childhood. There are many good books and parent effectiveness training classes can help. Nobody says we somehow magically know how to parent. This should not be misconstrued as a character defect but simply an opportunity or challenge to learn.

Yes: Parenting and marriage can be a strain together and seprately, especially when a baby comes along so soon. Work on communication skills, be patient and understanding, and seek counseling -- especially as you ask if you should! books and workshops by the gottman institute are very helpful ways to learn positive approaches to keeping relationships healthy. Good luck.