Occipital lymph node was very swollen almost two months ago. it is now smaller, but still not normal sized, and still quite painful. is this normal?

Lymph node swelling: No not normal. Good that it is smaller but a persistent lymph node over 1cm in size and tender for that long may need a biopsy, either with a needle or excision.

Monitoring Centers: Lymphatic system absorbs/carries things too big to go into the arteries/veins like bacteria eaten by white cells and digested food. Lymph nodes "taste" the lymph for anything bad like bacteria/viruses/cancers, etc. When it detects a problem, it alerts the immune system and your body reacts. They enlarge in response to the inflammation they create when they react. They shrink when all is well.