How can you work on our relationship w/o feeling like you have tasks?

Work is a task!: Tasks are not inherently bad, but they are work. How important is your relationship to you? If important, isn't it worth working on? The real trick here is to try to make the tasks not only successful but as pain free and if possible actually fun. Developing a good sense of humor about some things can go far in lightening the burden, shortening the task and improving the outcome.

Relationship?: Relationship is very important , and nothing wrong with feeling like you have tasks?

Relationships: These are built on mutual respect and consideration for the other persons' feelings, needs, and so on. If the stress induced by having to remember these sharing efforts appears overwhelming, perhaps you should reconsider the need to establish this relationship. It is all about compromise. Those who are unable and remain rigid and uncaring have very few stable relationships.