My pilonidial abcesse is about too burst! if i go too the er will they drain it that day? or do i have too do it my self? till i get the operation

Drain In ED: the emergency department physician will drain it, and refer you to a surgeon for further management, unless there is something else complicating your case.

Not a DIY project: Draining any abscess is not a DIY project. Your doctor (whoever you see, whether ER, urgent care, or regular office) will decide if what you have needs draining right then & there. If s/he decides that it needs draining, they'll do it before you leave rather than make you do it yourself. "The operation" that you refer to is not to drain abscess but to reduce risk of recurrence (return). Good luck!