People tell me i am an inspiration. they also count me successful.to the contrary i feel ashamed. life is tasteless and i'm sad all the time. pls help?

You may be: Depressed. There are several types. One is in response to a loss and another is more biologically based. Both can be helped w/therapy, exercise, lifestyle change, and perhaps medication. Please seek the help of a professional. Sounds like you have many appealing qualities but discount them because you know your flaws. We all have them.