Gf spoke last 4 yrs ago b4 her rare disease operation & nvr called after. her mom replied after 4 yrs, tht my gf is alive, not well. broken, suffering?

Take iniative now: ...Or regret your inaction rest of your life, not hers. People often make bad life choices, many without much consideration of long term result or consequences to others in their life. True friend will overlook or outright ignore their own ego and potential for emotional injury--and when successful, see risk worth benefit. If not, have answer with minimal loss of face.

It is sad that : No one kept you informed for 4 years. If your girlfriend does not want to see you, you need to find the strength to move on. Consider talking to a therapist.