I think i might be depressed, but i'm cautious of antidepressant medication? any advice?

Get evaluated: I suppose there are some depression screening lists on line but you should ask your doc for a referral. Life often provides us with challenges we do not have the skills to master. I would find a life coach/therapist to screen you and help you find further assistance as needed. At the very least they can teach you how to deal with stress.

Diagnosis first: Start with your GP for an exam and thorough medical history. If indeed diagnosed with depression counseling through a licensed psychologist would serve as an alternate or possible therapeutic approach.