Visited ophthalmologist and said i have a chalazion but he wont do surgery because its small its over a year old so compresses wont help what can i do?

Not to worry: Chalazia are benign cystic lesions in the lids representing the end stage of the battle your body made with a stye. Once formed, the only issue is the appearance. I am guessing that yours is so small that it can only be felt and cannot be seen. It will cause no problems so unless you are frankly obsessed with its presence, you should follow the advice of your ophthalmologist.