I'm not sure if this is elephantiasis or not. my family has had a history of big legs. how can we get them to be normal?

Elephantiasis: There are familial disorders that cause lymphedema - most of them cause lower leg swelling that's evident early on in life, sometimes soon after birth. There's a more well known cause of lymphedema (elephantiasis) which is from a nematode infection, so it's unlikely that all of your family members have this. This could simply be a trait that runs in your family- like red hair or being tall.

Veins or lymphedema: See a lymphedema specialist and a vein specialist: phlebologist- www.Phlebology.Org. Lymphedema and venous insufficiency can present with large swollen legs, even with skin irritations sometimes patients have phlebolymphedema. They have specific ultrasound tests for veins and testing for lymphedema.