My 3yo daughters behavior is a nightmare.it goes beyond typical tantrums and fit throwing,shes extremely mean to animals.what can i do,who do we see?

Red flag: I'm concerned. Your daughter needs to promptly see a pediatric psychologist with experience dealing with extreme behavioral issues. Please ask your pediatrian for a referral, do this soon so she can get the help she needs and you can understand how to deal with this.

Seek referral to a : child psychiatrist nearby in Longview: http://www.vitals.com/child-psychiatrists/tx/gilmer for evaluation, management & referral to a child psychologist for behavioral therapy. Ask your school district's Child Find Team to assess her development & check for autistic behaviors. Stop any/all verbal & physical aggression at home. BPD inheritance risk is ~ 20%. Obtain a 3-generation family history