What do you suggest if my right rotator cuff is either torn or stretched and the pain is incredible. my question is: how do i explain this pain to my wife ?

??: Rotator cuff impingement ( "bursitis") or frank rotator cuff tears can be quite painful especially w/overhead and 'away from the body' motions of your upper extremity. Pain @ night while sleeping on the affected side is typical.A diagnostic subacromial injection can confirm a RC etiology simply though not the severity. My suggestion is to bring your wife to the ORS w/ you! Good Luck!