I have cuts on my fingers and active cold sore . im worrying now because i have been washing my face etc without realising cuts . can i give it to my fingers (whitlow) if somehow water from my face splashes or my hands touch my pillow etc?

No risk, no worries. People highly resistant to new infections with the HSV type they already have and therefore self-transfer of virus to new body areas (auto inoculation) is rare. Whitlow occurs only during early HSV infection, not in people with longstanding oral or genital herpes. There may be rare exceptions for the eyes -- try to avoid rubbing your eyes when you have an oral herpes outbreak.