My daughter was born with a malformation on her ear drum. she had mri & ct but they say they have never seen this before and think its vascular?

Hard to say: It is hard to comment on such a specific issue without examining the ear drum and having the studies in hand. The ear drum is occasionally involved in vascular malformation syndromes like sturge weber sequence where it remains populated with an overgrowth of dilated capillaries that make it always appear very red. Other issues would require more info.

Glomus tumor: You didn't specify in your 1st ? That the vascular malformation is of her tympanic membrane (eardrum). It's probably a benign glomus tumor. The best place i know to get it removed is the house ear clinic in los angeles , ca, by dr. Derald e. Brackmann, who developed the procedure. If you go there, you're welcome to tell him i referred you. If not, find an otologist in a medical center near you.