What does it mean to be "in control of your emotions"? i thought emotions happen and you then deal with the situation?

In Charge: I hear all the time, stuff like: "he makes me mad." well, no one can "make" me mad, if i choose to not become mad. That is the same for all emotions. No one else should be able to influence one's emotions, or else, the person isn't really adequately in charge of his or her emotions. "in control" means a person can decide (most of the time), just how their emotions are expressed. Good question.

In control: You're right, emotions arise, and you deal with the situation. Being "in control of your emotions" does not mean not having the emotions -- it usually refers to being in charge of what you do with or about them. When angry, do you physically attack the person you're angry at, or do you speak with them about what angered you? Do you let yourself cool down before acting? These are important.

Emotions r believed: To arise from thoughts, which may occur so quickly that you are unaware of them. One way to control emotions is to be aware of these thoughts, sometimes called automatic thoughts, and consider whether the thoughts are rational or reasonable. Emotions often lead to behaviors, but we always have the opportunity to think about our feelings before we act on them.