After boyfriend committed suicide, panic attacks, breakdowns, hard to breathe, emotional, worried, avoid things that reminds me of it? help please?

Sxs after suicide : It sounds like this was a very traumatic experience for you! I regret that you've had to go through it. You may be suffering from an anxiety d/o yourself, now, like acute stress d/o or PTSD or panic disorder. Schedule a consultation with a doctor & discuss what you've been thru & ur symptoms. Both psychotherapy & medication can be helpful. Very best of luck to you!

Major Loss: I am so sorry to hear of your boyfriend's suicide. Clearly it has had a major impact on you. This is too big an issue to resolve using this venue except to encourage you to get help. Have you considered talking to a pastor or grief counselor? Would really recommend that. You are worth it and it will help you to process this loss and to continue moving forward with your life. Take care.