I have a hard time relaxing and would say i spend most of my time tense with knots in my muscles. what will work to get my body to stay relaxed?

Lots of options: Meditation, exercise, yoga, a hot bath, stretching and even journal writing are all great ways to help you relax. Turn off the tv, the computer, the phone and allow yourself to reduce your stress by doing something that you enjoy and that makes you feel good. It's important that you seek this type of care of yourself for good long-term health.

Massage, OMM: Massage therapy and osteopathic manipulation are both great ways to help get your muscles to relax. Of particular note is a relatively new form of omm know as the fascial distortion model. This helps to directly treat distortions in the fascia (the "wrapper" the encloses all parts of our body), especially things like the lumps and bumps you are describing. Hunt around for a do who practices fdm.