I have severe anxiety and some depression. i've had anxiety since i was a young teen it gets hard for me to think. worse around large groups of people?

Seek help: I think you should seek professional help to deal with this fear of the public, otherwise known as agoraphobia. You may need the combination of therapy and a medication to deal with the symptoms

Eval: Get a psychiatric evaluation for your anxiety and whatever else may be going on, and talk with the psychiatrist about whether or not meds are needed, and your feelings about being medicated. Then get a referral for a reputable psychotherapist to help deal with whatever is ailing you.