I have a passing kidney stone, ct showed it in the lower part of the ureter. its large 4x10mm long. how do i know if it has passed into my bladder?

Colic: 4x10 mm is a pretty big stone. The ureter tapers as it approaches the uvj. Only nerve endings are "stretch fibers, so obstruction causes the pain ("colic"). Even if the pain eases/resolves, the only way to know if it "passes" is to strain all urine/save the stone. A stone sitting in your bladder will not cause pain. Best to use a fine mesh aquarium fish net. You should be taking tamsulosin.