I had ruptured ectopic pregnancy surgery on 11/30/13. when is it safe to go back to the gym and/or have intercourse?

Depends: The biggest factor depends on whether your surgery was through an 'open' incision (either horizontally, such as a 'bikini cut'; or an 'up and down' incision) or laparoscopically. Certainly by 4 weeks after laparoscopic surgery you should be healed sufficiently to resume exercise and intercourse. Typically intercourse is fine by 4wks after an open incision, but not 'core' exercising.