Can someone with bpd borderline personality do something like stalking and not mean too?

They need therapy: It is important that people take responsibility for their actions. Having borderline personality disorder is no excuse for illegal or inappropriate behavior. These individuals are held accountable for their actions.

Not be responsible?: Indeed! That's part of the deal. BPDs may not feel bad about it - they just did it not to harm, but they just did. It's a reason they get in trouble and feel misjudged. It's why it's hard to change patterns, but it may be possible w/ patience and real willingness by them to try to see how it looks to others. Good luck!