What do you recommend if i have a fear of wearing tampons?

Educate yourself.: There are a number of sites on line that provide thorough education about tampons including how to properly insert them. Consider starting with a "slim" tampon that has a plastic (vice cardboard) applicator.

Anything else: If at age 42 if you have never used tampons then use pads or a cervical cup. Otherwise, things can get a bit ":messy" without some protection.