I've been getting conflicting answers on whether choosing to refrain from masturbation can be deleterious to your health. what's the truth? thank you

No worries: It should be harmless as long as one does not use too much force or friction on his or her genitals. Realize that the body has essentially the same response to masturbation as to sex for the purpose of reproduction. That means the body reacts just as it does during sexual intercourse, which of course, has no harmful side effects on the body. If the habit is causing anxiety, there are ways to stop.

Obvious battle: It is obvious that you are in a battle with yourself over what is a common part of human sexuality. Do or not/ it has no effect on your health as some adults do and some never do and live out healthy functional lives either way. A better question is why you have spent so much time and effort obsessing over this topic. Seek out a counselor to see what other issues in your life are triggering this.