Sadness, hopelessness, interest loss in people and activities, loneliness, crying, self-hurting on anger blackouts. & more, am I having a depression?

Sounds likely. You could have a medical problem that is causing these symptoms, but you've just listed some of the major symptoms of depression. See your doctor and make sure you are physically healthy. Talk about depression and possible treatment options. Treatment will depend on how severe your symptoms are, how long they have been going on, and several other factors. Good luck.
It sounds like you . May be depressed. You are clearly suffering. Please get help. Ensure your personal physician knows what you are experiencing. You need medical assessment to rule out medical causes for depression. Therapy is very important. Cognitive behavioral therapy is proving to often be effective. Psychiatric medications may also be indicated. Depression is treatable - please get help soon.