How do I balance spending time with my new four month baby boy and my husband evenly with out feeling like im neglecting the other one?

E.A.S.Y. E.A.S.Y. Help baby develop a pattern of eating when you decide. Preferably every 3-4 hours during daytime. After eating, keep her awake for 20-30 min. So she doesn't require feeding to prompt sleep. Place baby in separate area from eating for sleeping. Routines for sleep by 8pm. Then you time for a couple hours w spouse at end of the day. Hang in there. Dr. J.
Date night. When you feel comfortable with having a baby sitter or grandparent to watch over your little one, go out on date nights to catch up. Do this regularly. Also make child raising a team effort, each parent with certain tasks that contribute his care.
Adult vs baby. It's not about even-ness or fairness. Your baby boy needs your time and attention in order to thrive. Your hubby would like your time and attention but he is an adult and should try to be understanding of *his* baby's needs. You also should try and involve him in the baby's care as much as possible. At about this time, it's also a good idea to get a sitter one nite a week for a date night.