Are you taking meds?
You don't say if you have tried any rx, but you should talk to your psych to see if s/he thinks some type of meds might be helpful, or has any other recommendations.
If your psych is not a md, you may want to see one for rx eval. If you haven't already, you might consult with an expert in bpd
. Dbt is often helpful. Sounds like you've tried hard to find ways to feel better. Keep at it. Good luck.