I have a very very abnormal penis. Curves?

Curve is normal. Most guys do not have a straight penis. They bend up, down and sideways. If you develop a new bend that seems to be getting worse over time, it may related to a condition known as peyronie's disease and treatment, though limited, is available. A urologist can induce an erection with medication, in the office to evaluate the bend to help determine if it's a problem.
Not uncommon. There are different degrees of curvature, and sometimes there is pain associated with an errection with a penis at drastic different angles. It would be best for you to see an experienced urologist. You might consider taking a digital picture of your erection so you can show your doctor what you are concerned about. Just don't show the picture to anybody else other than your doctor.