Can you tell me if any other adult males with autism, ocd, or anything similar find they cannot get an erection quickly with?

Erections. In my experience the difficulty with obtaining an erection is often due to the medications they are taking such as ssris for ocd. There is, to the best of my knowledge, any particular reason for those disorders themselves to cause erection difficulties. There may be some other issue and seeing your family physician would be a good start.