14 doctors weighed in:
My daughter will not sleep the whole night by herself in her own bed without waking up & crawling into bed with me. I tried all angles, & am losing...?
14 doctors weighed in

5 doctors agree
In brief: Learned behavior
Sleep is a somewhat learned behavior and kids learn by association.
If all your child knows is the same routine at night, to get up and go to your room, that is what she will do. Change the bedtime routine, and explain in clear terms what you want her to do, and stick to to your request. It may take you escorting her back to bed every night for a couple of weeks but in the end she will learn.

In brief: Learned behavior
Sleep is a somewhat learned behavior and kids learn by association.
If all your child knows is the same routine at night, to get up and go to your room, that is what she will do. Change the bedtime routine, and explain in clear terms what you want her to do, and stick to to your request. It may take you escorting her back to bed every night for a couple of weeks but in the end she will learn.
Dr. Josephine Ruiz-Healy
Dr. Josephine Ruiz-Healy
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Dr. Michael Amster
Pediatrics
5 doctors agree
In brief: Expectations
This is a power struggle, pure and simple.
She's waking up and being allowed to get back into bed with you, and is getting secondary gain from doing so. Occasionally there can be a real fear or feeling of instability, but mostly it's nice for her and expedient for you. Best thing to do, repeatedly, non emotionally and without any lengthy explanation, walk her back to her bed and leave her there.

In brief: Expectations
This is a power struggle, pure and simple.
She's waking up and being allowed to get back into bed with you, and is getting secondary gain from doing so. Occasionally there can be a real fear or feeling of instability, but mostly it's nice for her and expedient for you. Best thing to do, repeatedly, non emotionally and without any lengthy explanation, walk her back to her bed and leave her there.
Dr. Michael Amster
Dr. Michael Amster
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2 comments
Dr. Anifat Balogun
Consider seeing a pediatric sleep specialist and/or your daughter's pediatrician for reinforcements. They can let you know of age appropriate strategies you can employ. Good Luck!
Dr. Johanna Fricke
Very nice answer. Don't forget to reward her for staying in her own bed all night as well as for daytime behaviors that help her learn & grow. Children repeat behaviors that work to gain any kind of attention & give up behaviors that don't. Yet, selectively ignoring a child's maladaptive behaviors is difficult for many parents, as is immediately reinforcing adaptive behaviors.
Dr. Johanna Fricke
Pediatrics - Developmental & Behavioral
2 doctors agree
In brief: Establish a regular
bedtime. Read, cuddle, brush her teeth & put her in her own bed, drowsy, but awake to learn to self-calm for sleep.
Explain at her language level that if she gets up, you'll walk her back to bed without talking or making eye contact. Expect the behavior to escalate in an attempt to gain the prior reinforcement, then extinguish, as long as you consistently ignore it. See healthychildren.org.

In brief: Establish a regular
bedtime. Read, cuddle, brush her teeth & put her in her own bed, drowsy, but awake to learn to self-calm for sleep.
Explain at her language level that if she gets up, you'll walk her back to bed without talking or making eye contact. Expect the behavior to escalate in an attempt to gain the prior reinforcement, then extinguish, as long as you consistently ignore it. See healthychildren.org.
Dr. Johanna Fricke
Dr. Johanna Fricke
Thank
Dr. James Ferguson
Pediatrics
In brief: Enforce what U expct
You wouldn't let her take a dump in the living room so why you won't enforce your expectation she stay in her bed is important.
It is important that she understand you love her, but you expect her to stay in her bed.When you decide you really mean it you can do this.

In brief: Enforce what U expct
You wouldn't let her take a dump in the living room so why you won't enforce your expectation she stay in her bed is important.
It is important that she understand you love her, but you expect her to stay in her bed.When you decide you really mean it you can do this.
Dr. James Ferguson
Dr. James Ferguson
Thank
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