Doctor insights on:
Why Does It Take Me Forever To Have An Orgasm
Very common in women: If you are talking about orgasms with your partner then for some women, foreplay starts 2-3 days before sex. Your partner may need to call you and plant ideas in your mind before they ever get to touch you. Foreplay done well makes sex and orgasms much easier. Anybody can have an orgasm, expert foreplay is much harder to find. Have a chat with your partner about what you like long before you start. ...Read more
Conventionally, orgasm is the culmination of sexual arousal (and may be repeated) and typically produces great pleasure through direct genital stimulation of the male penis and female clitoris. However, orgasm may also be achieved via the brain or as a reflex arc. The physical characteristics are an explosive peak & repeated neuromuscular action causing release of male ...Read more
"so long"?: I'm not sure how you're judging the "so long" part? Sounds like you're comparing to someone or something else? Some people say this when they haven't taken time to explore what pleases them & what doesn't. Perhaps speaking with a sex therapist would help. You can find a trained one through the american association of sexuality educators, counselors & therapists: http://www. Aasect. Org/. ...Read more
Variable: This varies by individual, amount of foreplay, mood, and level of excitement, and how much you and your partner are 'into it.' try varying your technique, adding some erotica, or every once in a while just go for a spontaneous 'quickie' to change things up. The best thing is to not 'worry' about the timing, just enjoy. Worry leads to stress and this can lead to performance issues. ...Read more
Time and patience: With some effort, you can learn to reach orgasm. There really isn't anything you can take to help however. One thing you could do is see a sex therapist. They can help you and your partner to figure this out if the first thing you try doesn't work. There are many good books out on this. I recommend "the multiorgasmic woman", written by my friend, rachel abrams, md. ...Read more
Paradox: I would suggest trying to make the process longer...But consider helping her climax in different ways. Ask her what she likes. Encourage her 2 experiment. This seems like a great opportunity for the two of you 2 start fresh as if you were just first getting together. Learn what you like, what turns each other on. Some food for thought: http://bit. Ly/13mkr5e from "go ask alice" service, columbia u. ...Read more
It depends: By masturbation, usually a few minutes unless you have had a recent ejaculation. It takes more time for men to have a second orgasm after an orgasm. From intercourse, it could take a few seconds (premature ejaculation) to not being able to have an ejaculation, especially if you have never had sex. First time sexual experiences don;t always work out very well. With practice, it usually gets better. ...Read more
It varies: Everyone is different. It can vary from seconds to hours. ...Read more
Retro' ejaculation?: You may be confusing orgasm with ejaculation of semen. A more "open" bladder neck has no effect on orgasm, but could result in retrograde (internal) ejaculation. Have you had surgery on your prostate or lower urinary tract? Or maybe taking Flomax® or similar drug? If so, you probably have a urologist. Discuss with him or her, or find a urologist now. Good luck. ...Read more
Maybe: If you're always used a tight grip and/or fast strokes, it may be harder to ejaculate with some partners. Vary your technique when you're enjoying your own body, and learn to time yourself. You and that special person will both be glad. ...Read more
Yes: Keegel exercises, sex therapy, vibrator. No medication to help this sorry. ...Read more
Sex: Unfortunately one does not go to the doctor to learn how to have sex. There are some significant ethical barriers here. But, there are good sex guides and other resources to find. I often recommend to females connecting with this group to learn about their bodies: <a href="http://www. Ourbodiesourselves. Org" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">http://www. Ourbodiesourselves. Org</a>. Or a good sex guide. ...Read more
My girlfriend always orgasms way before me, anything I can do so she doesn't get bored while I take a while?
Inappropriate: There is no such science, medical interest or reason to be asking this question. It is not one you would bring to the doctor. There is ABSOLUTELY no right answer to this question about sex. It varies from time to time and from man to man. There are very strict boundaries about sex when it comes to doctor. We have no opinion on when, how, where, or with whom you are sexual. ...Read more
When I masturbate it takes me more than 2 hours to orgasm. Can I do to speed up the process because I feel like I am sick or something?
Learning Sexuality: This question may be best answered by a sex therapist. It is abnormal and you may need some instructions or exercises to get to a more normal sexual experience. You may want to also read one or more of the many sex guides that are available such as "the joy of sex". I often advise my female patients to take ownership of their sexuality and their bodies with the book: "our bodies our selves". ...Read more
I can't orgasm during any sexual activity because of pills I take. What can I do to try to change that other then to stop taking the pills?
No orgasm: I am not sure what medications you are taking. However, many meds can cause side effects. Fortunately, physicians can choose from a variety that have no sexual side effects. Keep in mind that are other medical conditions that can decrease your sex drive. Also, if a med is calusing a low sex drive that are other meds to counteract the sexual side effects. The big challenge is to get help. ...Read more
I take medications that reduce my desire for sex, though I can orgasm, but I really need the meds; changed my life. Tips for, uh, encouraging desire?
I've been on tri cyclen for less than a month. For three weeks I have been unable to orgasm easily. It takes an hour manually, via bf not at all. Help!
Multifactorial: Inability to orgasm can be influenced by many factors, including medications, stress, illness, and many others. If nothing else has changed and your ability to orgasm is negatively affected by your birth control pill, a lower-hormone or non-hormonal form of birth control may be more appropriate for you. Ask your doctor if a different form of birth control may be more appropriate. ...Read more
Is masturbation healthy when you are 19 years old? (female) why does it take me a long time orgasm?
Not unhealthy!: There is absolutely nothing medically wrong with masturbation, but plenty of religious and old-fashioned ideas exist that can make one feel "guilty" about it. That's also probably the reason it's an effort for you. If you are ok with it then free yourself from the "stigma" and learn what feels good. You will be a better partner if you know what you like and communicate this when ready! Practice! ...Read more
How could I treat my self from premature ejaculation. Its too early takes without orgasm. Pls suggest?
Several ideas: Sometimes a condom or a dab of anesthetic cream on the glans is all it takes. Your physician might give you a very low dose of a selective serotonin reuptake inhibitor. Your best choice is to learn the squeeze technique and practice it with your partner. You'll both enjoy it, improve your skills and make one another happy. Best wishes. ...Read more
I'm 18. Why does it take me so long to have an orgasm with my boyfriend? I do masterbate, is that a problem?
Orgasm: Having an orgasm involves multiple factors that include both physical and psychological stimulation. Performance anxiety, and the simple fact that you think about not reaching orgasm in a timely manner can affect your ability to do so. Try discussing this with bf, and or experimenting with different sexual activities to stimulate and arouse you differently. A sex therapist can be helpful too. ...Read more
I'm healthy, active and in perimenopause. Hard time reaching orgasm, new problem. Used lube, still takes long time. Bloodwork normal. Any help?
See a doctor: See a primary, gynecologist or urogynecologist. Recommend evaluation of medication conditions such as diabetes, nerve disorders, back disorders....that could be contributing. If no medical issues, then your brain is your largest sex organ. Find things that stimulate your brain. Practice makes perfect. ...Read more
20 y/o male in long-distance/long-term relationship with a problem with orgasms. Takes me very long to orgasm, if at all before we stop. Any advice?
Consider? Psychologic: Long distance relationships are frequently difficult on both sides. You already realize U have an anxiety disorder which could also be related to your problme, as can pressures of college. Suggest U consider counselling. Your primary family Dr. Or College Dr. Might be able to direct U for appropriate counseling. Good Luck. ...Read more
Is it okay to take a 2 day break from Effexor (venlafaxine) after about a month? Would like to see if orgasms return. Will resume Effexor (venlafaxine) afterwards.
Sexual side effects:
Anytime you have side effects, discuss with your provider, and determine a course of action.
If you’re requiring two days per month due to side effects, perhaps another medication is in order. Please inform your prescriber in order help him/her to determine a more tolerable plan that’s right for you. Good luck! ...Read more
I (female, 22) can orgasm really quickly when masturbating but it takes forever when having sex. What's wrong with me?
Here are some. ..: Through your imagination & practice, you may recapture and simulate what you do during masturbation by giving ample foreplay under less stressful environ, getting similar physical stimulation from yourself or partner with adequate intimate communication during sexual intercourse to reproduce the joy... There would be no magic pill to restore but trying the above. It's doable. But if not improving ...Read more
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