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Wolcott, Connecticut
A 27-year-old male asked:

should your children fear you? and should you threaten to beat your kids to get them to do you want? my family is old fashioned and believes that

4 doctor answers9 doctors weighed in
Dr. Robert GalatzerLevy
Child Psychiatry 50 years experience
Fear is not respect: Children need guidance and structure that can come from respected parents. Fear leads to unthinking submission and often confusion that is not a solid basis for moral values. When a parent hits a child or threatens to do so the child understands that the parent is weak and has nothing more the brute force available.
Dr. Barbara Lavi
Clinical Psychology 35 years experience
Although fear: May lead to compliance it also may push children to be secretive about their lives and behavior. Parents cannot guide their children if they do not know what they are doing and thinking about. Fear is not conducive to open and honest communication between children and parents. Physical punishment often backfires: the child gets angry with the parent avoids taking responsibility for their behavior.
Dr. Carlos Satulovsky
Psychiatry 28 years experience
Generating admiration and respect is better, fear is traumatic sometimes
Nov 16, 2013
Dr. William Moore
Psychiatry 68 years experience
Absolutely NOT!: A child is to be nurtured and cared for, raised to be productive in society. Child-rearing involves big time commitments from parents to instill proper behavior. It involves patience, repetition and discipline to develop respect and obedience. They must know that you love them, fearing consequences, not you. To parent most effectively, be consistent, firm and loving. Violence has no place here.
Dr. James Ferguson
Pediatrics 46 years experience
Multi-generational: Just because your family did it and you survived does not make it reasonable.I remember an abusive mom who cited being chained under the porch as abuse, not her beating her kids.When you rule by fear and beating they may survive and will pass it on. There chances of ending up in jail are high when this spills into the way they deal with others.

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Last updated Oct 4, 2016

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